The Rockwood Files: The numbers are adding up

By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mama of 3

My husband and I were born five years and two days apart in March. Since it’s birthday season again, here are 52 things I’ve noticed about turning 52.

1. Numbers are not my thing.
2. I struggle to remember the exact age I am during any given year.
3. Has this ever happened to you?
4. My shortcut is to ask Tom how old he is and then subtract five.
5. If Tom isn’t around, I subtract 1973 from the current year and attempt to do the math in my head.
6. But I inevitably screw it up during the “carry the one” part.
7. So, I resort to using the calculator app on my phone.
8. Tom tells me this is the year I turn 52 and he turns 57.
9. This is also our first birthday season as empty nesters.
10. We’ve had a little more than six months to adjust.
11. But we still have mixed emotions about it.
12. This new peace and quiet is sometimes wonderful and relaxing.
13. And sometimes eerie and sad.
14. It’s hard to know how the quiet will hit us on any given day.
15. One of the good things about having fewer people in the house is how much easier it is to keep the kitchen clean.
16. Sometimes it takes nearly a week to fill the dishwasher.
17. When our three kids were here, it only took about 40 minutes.
18. Another perk? We have time to take better care of ourselves.
19. Walking is one of our favorite medicines.
20. Because it makes us more agreeable humans.
21. When Daylight Saving Time began, we celebrated with a long walk listening to a great audio book on a gorgeous 70-degree day.
22. Our middle-aged Corgi didn’t go with us.
23. He’s a homebody with an intense fear of mailboxes.
24. He was never attacked by a mailbox, so we can’t explain the weird phobia.
25. Last week while I was traveling, Tom coaxed the Corgi to go on a walk with him.
26. The dog made it past several menacing mailboxes.
27. He almost enjoyed himself.
28. But then his short Corgi legs got worn out after several blocks.
29. So Tom had to walk home carrying a 25-pound loaf of dog in his arms.
30. Carrying a tired dog home is a form of weight training, which is another thing we should be doing in our 50s.
31. Doctors say we should also be able to get up after sitting on the floor without using our hands.
32. It’s so much harder than it sounds.
33. You might think you’re in relatively good shape.
34. But you may change your mind after trying to get off the floor with no hands.
35. One of my recent attempts required not only hands, but also rolling over to a knee, then holding on to a nearby counter to accomplish it.
36. I didn’t make it look easy
37. And I could feel the dog judging me.
38. How much walking, weight training, balance exercise, and stretching does it take to become a middle-aged maven who can spring up off the floor like a jack-in-the box?
39. I bet it’s a lot.
40. So for now, I’m trying to not end up on the floor in the first place.
41. Other than all the upkeep we have to do for our middle-aged bodies, Tom and I like this phase of our lives.
42. Even when the kids aren’t here, we still have plenty in common.
43. We like hanging out with each other.
44. We laugh a lot.
45. And we’re still learning how to be better versions of ourselves.
46. We love having a front row seat to watch our kids live their lives.
47. We try to eat our popcorn and give opinions only when asked.
48. It’s their story to write, not ours.
49. We’re just supporting characters who once changed their diapers.
50. And we’ll love them no matter what plot twists come their way.
51. Overall, we’re lucky because the numbers are going our way: 26 years of marriage, plus 3 kids, plus 2 dogs, plus 1 elderly cat, plus at least 20 friends and family who will help us off the floor if we need it.
52. Add them all together (remember to carry the one) and you’ll get 52.

Gwen Rockwood is a syndicated freelance columnist. Email her at gwenrockwood5@gmail.com. Her book is available on Amazon.