By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mom of 3
I’ve always been a “jeans girl,” and I still am. They’re a classic for a reason. But certain times in life require kinder, gentler clothing. And because we’re smack dab in the middle of that season — which stretches from October 31st to New Year’s Day — it’s time to talk about pants.
Yes, I’m thankful for family, food, shelter, seat warmers, and close friends who keep me sane. But make no mistake, soft pants are also high on the list.
Some people define soft pants as pajama pants or sweatpants. And yes, those meet the “soft” requirement, and I love them both. But for me, the perfect pair of soft pants combines comfy coziness with just enough structure and refinement so you can bump into a neighbor outside or run a few errands without looking like you’ve stopped caring completely. Give me a soft pant with straight, classic lines, made of marshmallow-soft fabric that neither billows out too far nor clings too close.
And this brings up the most controversial issue related to soft pants, which is this: Are leggings and soft pants the same thing? Different people have different answers. For me, the answer is no, they’re not the same. But maybe that’s because I grew up in a time when school districts made it clear that leggings were not pants, but more like a thicker pair of tights, and should be used accordingly.
Personally, I avert my eyes any time I see fabric stretched so tight across a person’s nether regions that I might know only slightly less about them than their gynecologist or urologist. Regardless of their age, gender, or body type, it feels like too much information to share with random people on the street. But that’s just my humble, possibly outdated opinion. I understand that others will have a much different perspective on it, and they’re entitled to their own soft-pants convictions, too.
What we can all agree on is how wonderfully forgiving a pair of soft pants can be when you need them most. They don’t make cutting remarks to your face or on your waist. They understand that the weeks between Halloween and New Year’s Day are an obstacle course of temptation, indulgence, and the most festive foods of the year. Soft pants see our predicament, and they’re here to help:
Ate too many fun-size Snickers on Halloween? No problem. Here’s a bit more stretch.
Stuffed yourself even fuller than the Thanksgiving turkey? Soft pants will comfort you through the pumpkin-pie-fueled waves of regret.
Have a weakness for Christmas fudge? Soft pants won’t judge.
Here’s hoping you already have or can go out and find a pair of pleasing, peace-giving, petal-soft pants. Not too thin but not too bulky. Clean and simple but never schlubby. And if the fit makes you feel shrink-wrapped, ditch those pants and try again.
Life can be hard, but your pants don’t have to be.
From my home to yours, have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
Gwen Rockwood is a syndicated freelance columnist. Email her at gwenrockwood5@gmail.com. Her book is available on Amazon.
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