We really appreciate the dads who answer questions for us here on Inside His Head. Guys, you’ve helped us gain insight into how dudes think and have offered some great advice to women in Northwest Arkansas over the years.
Thanks, Inside His Head husbands! This question is from the mamas, because we’re curious:
Father’s Day is coming up and that usually means ties, cologne and cooked meat. What would your Ultimate Father’s Day day actually look like? (If ties, cologne and cooked meat factor into the day, there’s no shame.)
GRAY: I don’t often wear ties and never wear cologne, though the allure of some tasty cooked meat is difficult to turn down any time of year. And I’m sure many dads, such as myself, don’t need token gifts.
If my daughter was old enough to be away from home, a phone call would be nice. Not just a “Hi. Happy Father’s Day. Gotta run.” kind of call, but a genuine conversation about how they are and what they’re doing.
Since my daughter isn’t that old yet, I think letting her have a fun-filled day would be nice. I think it’s when we see our children having fun or achieving personal goals that we most feel like dads, whether it be pushing them on a swing, watching a movie on the couch or going out for a bike ride.
And just to go back to the meat thing for a minute, a good meal is always welcome, but not for the gluttony of gorging ones self. The real pleasure of any meal should be the company and conversation around the table.
I suspect it’s a lot like any other day in which we celebrate. As we get older the less presents matter and the more substance is important. I’d certainly skip everything to simply have a day to look back on with my daughter and remember it as what being a father is all about.
Follow that up with pancakes at home with the family. A walk around the square at the farmers market and then a trip to the library.
Lunch somewhere on Dickson.
A short hike somewhere close, then home for a quick shower followed by dinner at Greenhouse Grille with just my wife. Finish the night snuggled on the couch with all my girls while we watch a movie.
While I know a lot of dad’s would like some solitude on their day, and I understand that urge as well as most, I would of course want to spend the day in the company of my lovely daughter and spouse.
Because I’d have to be there to watch my lovely daughter and spouse mow the yard, do the weed-eating and clean up our small chicken coop.
After the showers and the griping had settled down, we’d all go to the movies.
I usually get to pick anyway because my wife tends to select films that are just terrible, but to be safe I’d invoke the Father’s Day rule and select an action-adventure film. If the girls want to see something, well, girly, I’d send them along to watch something frilly and I’d sit by myself in the dark with a big tub of popcorn and not feel one bit guilty.
To prove I’m not a total load, I’d take care of cooking dinner.
Perhaps grilling some steaks and burgers, fresh corn would have to be there, and as a slight nod to my heath, a small salad. Afterward we’d all go out for ice cream to properly undue all the good stuff from the salad.
The evening would involve some TV watching, perhaps re-runs of Arrow, or The Flash or Gravity Falls. We’d laugh and joke and likely snack.
And while I’m sure, after all of this, I’d feel properly spoiled, I’d also feel grateful.
And while moms get a lot of the credit for child rearing and as Chris Rock said so famously, “Nobody every says, ‘Hey dad thanks for knocking out that rent’” I’m just happy to be my daughter’s dad and my wife’s husband.
But a little recognition, an the odd tie now and then, doesn’t hurt.