Get tickets to Walk a Mile shoe shopping event!

walk a mile graphicIf you haven’t already grabbed a ticket to attend THE best shoe shopping event of the year, now is the time because the Walk a Mile in My Shoes “preview party” is coming up on May 15th at the Northwest Arkansas Convention Center in Springdale. (The public sale is that next day on Saturday, May 16th.)

polka dot shoeBut if you’re interested in the best selection, you’ll definitely want to get a ticket to the preview party (and don’t wait too long because there are only a limited number of tickets that will be sold.) The event starts on Friday, May 15, 2015 at 5:30 p.m. and goes until 7:30 p.m.. There will be fine chocolates, wine and cheese for all the hungry shoe shoppers. And did we mention that shoes and handbags at this event start at $10 and go up to only $20? If you’re a fan of getting an amazing deal, this sale will make you happy.

Keep in mind, too, that ticket sales for the preview party as well as sale proceeds help support Ozark Guidance Center, a local non-profit organization with offices throughout Northwest Arkansas. We love it when shopping and supporting a great cause go hand-in-hand. Click HERE for info on how to get a ticket to the preview party.

If you can’t make it to the preview party, the public sale event starts at 8 a.m. on Saturday, May 16, 2015 at the same location and ends at 1 p.m.

i love shoesHOW TO DONATE SHOES AND BAGS: Let’s admit it. We all have at least one pair of shoes in our closet that we fell in love with at the store and then wore them one time and realized that they don’t really fit comfortably (even though they’re still super cute.) Those shoes might fit someone else’s foot perfectly so donate them to this sale! Ask your friends, neighbors, co-workers or relatives to round up a few of their gently used shoes and/or handbags, too, and then drop them off at one of these donation sites:

  • Local radio stations Magic 107.9, Kix 104, 933 The Eagle, HotMix 101.9): 2049 E. Joyce Blvd., Suite 101, in Fayetteville
  • Everett Chevrolet: 1159 N. 45th St. in Springdale
  • Everett Dodge: 3709 S. Thompson in Springdale
  • Dress for Success: Frisco Station Mall, 100 N. Dixieland (Suite B8) in Rogers

Note: All donations are tax-deductible.

ANOTHER WAY TO HELP: Please help spread the word about this fun event to your fellow shoe and handbag-lovers. Post it on Facebook, Instagram or Tweet about it today. See you at the big sale! (We’ll be the ones stocking up on strappy sandals for summer!)

On Your Mind: Single mom fighting against urge to cut

on your mindNOTE: The question below reached us through our “online hotline” button which lets anyone send a question to a local counselor at Ozark Guidance — in a completely anonymous way. The email comes in with no email address and no identifying information. We set it up this way so women would feel free to write about anything on their mind.

I am a single mother with two children and I currently live with my mother. Over the past two weeks, my mother has begun to overly criticize me and has even begun to aim negative comments about me in front of my children. These comments are very hurtful and they are intended to be hurtful. I suffer from depression and even though I’m on medication, I feel myself slipping further and further with each negative and intentionally hurtful remark. I used to self-mutilate and have been recovered for almost two years, yet due to sad depressionthe constant comments I feel myself slipping back towards cutting. I can’t financially leave the environment and I’m afraid I will end up hurting myself. I am at my wit’s end and I don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t take very much more.

Thank you for reaching out to ask for help as you deal with a very difficult situation. It takes a lot of strength to admit that you need help.

Let me start by saying that it’s NOT okay for your mother to talk to you like that. No amount of medication could make that hurt any less.

There are other ways to help in this situation; we like to call them coping skills. Coping skills are strategies we can use to help us deal with stressful situations.  In this instance, setting boundaries with your mother could help. When she makes a hurtful comment toward you, it’s appropriate for you to say “I don’t like it when you say things like this, please stop” or “It’s not ok to talk to me like that” or “Please don’t say things like that to me in front of my kids.”

She may or may not respond positively when you assert yourself, but continue to let her know that you do not find these comments acceptable. Try to remain calm and respectful during this time. You’re not attempting to insult her, but instead, you’re working toward standing up for yourself. If the situation does not improve, and you don’t feel that you can keep yourself safe, you may want to consider moving into a temporary living situation at a shelter.

You mentioned in your question that these hurtful comments are increasing your desire for cutting. You also said that you do NOT want to cut again, and I can feel your determination. Congratulations on two years without cutting. That’s huge!

Here’s my question for you: What did you do in the past to stop cutting? Is that something you could try again? Oftentimes people cut to release emotional pain. There are other ways to get the pain out: some people like to journal. Others find meditation helpful. You may find that what worked before isn’t helping anymore.

If that’s the case, please reach out. Ozark Guidance Center is here to help.  Please call us at 479-750-2020.

Therapists at Ozark Guidance would be happy to answer your questions and read what’s on your mind. Click the butterfly icon below to fill out an anonymous submission form with your question or concern. The form contains NO identifying information and is designed to give local women an online place to share concerns with a person qualified to offer feedback.

Disclaimer: This RESPONSE does not provide medical advice It is intended for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Never ignore professional medical advice in seeking treatment because of something you have read on nwaMotherlode or Ozark Guidance websites.

On Your Mind: Are you “a little OCD”?

on your mindThere’s a running joke in our house about how I act a little “OCD” sometimes. But lately, the joke is not so funny because I’m really getting worried that my “routines” actually might be turning into a disorder like OCD. I’m not sure if I’m just super picky about door-lock-407427_640things or if this is an actual problem. I find that my routines (like what I do before I leave the house like locking doors, turning out lights, etc.) are taking longer and longer to do. Sometimes I do it once but sometimes I can’t leave my house until I do it three or four times. I just don’t trust myself to do it right, and I’m afraid my kids are going to feel compelled to do things just like I do them. Can OCD be contagious? How do I know when this becomes something I need to talk to a doctor about?

You raise an interesting question. The phrase “I’m a little OCD” is casually tossed around in today’s society. Let’s take a moment to consider how mental health professionals think about obsessive-compulsive disorder. Think about it like this: your brain is the clearinghouse for your thoughts and emotions. For some people, the brain can get stuck on certain thoughts. These thoughts make you believe that you are in imminent danger, and this can lead to feelings of anxiety.

Anxiety causes you to panic, and your brain turns to solutions to get rid of that feeling. For people with OCD, compulsions are the brain’s solution to obsessive thoughts. These compulsions lead to relief from overwhelming feelings of anxiety. If you were suffering from OCD, there would be nothing pleasurable about cabinet-334128_640acting on compulsions, yet you believe these actions are the only way to protect yourself from threats against you and your family.

Compulsions can include things like ordering, counting, cleaning, putting things in a particular order (symmetry), or checking to make sure nothing bad has happened to the people you love.

Since people with OCD derive no pleasure from acting on their compulsions, they’ll go out of their way to avoid situations that could trigger obsessions or compulsions. People with OCD believe these actions are the only way to protect themselves, and they would prefer to be doing anything else. People with OCD don’t believe they have a choice in acting on their compulsions. These actions help relieve the intensity of their obsessive thoughts for a short amount of time.

OCD is prevalent in a little over 1 percent of the population. While OCD is not contagious per se, it is more common in first-degree relatives. I tell you this with caution. It’s important not to self-diagnose or to begin diagnosing other members of your family. I would encourage you to seek the opinion of a mental health professional before jumping to conclusions.

People who suffer from OCD differ significantly from people who may consider themselves perfectionists that prefer order and people who enjoy arranging things in a certain way. People who enjoy ordering their home or their possessions are not necessarily suffering from OCD. If you have doubts as to which category you might fall into, Ozark Guidance can help. Please contact us at 479-750-2020.

Therapists at Ozark Guidance would be happy to answer your questions and read what’s on your mind. Click the butterfly icon below to fill out an anonymous submission form with your question or concern. The form contains NO identifying information and is designed to give local women an online place to share concerns with a person qualified to offer feedback.

Disclaimer: This RESPONSE does not provide medical advice It is intended for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Never ignore professional medical advice in seeking treatment because of something you have read on nwaMotherlode or Ozark Guidance websites.

Calling All Shoe Lovers: Save this date!

shoes conquer the world

If you love to shop for shoes and finding an amazing deal makes you crazy happy, write down this date because this is THE ultimate shoe shopping event in Northwest Arkansas.

Ozark Guidance_Horizontal_Banner_Color_1970 (2)The Walk a Mile in My Shoes shopping event happens this year on May 15-16, 2015. It’s an amazing fundraiser that helps support Ozark Guidance.

This event has grown like crazy since it was introduced several years ago, so the selection of shoes is ENORMOUS. This year’s event will take place at the Holiday Inn Convention Center in Springdale, right off the Interstate.

Shoppers at this event can buy men and women’s shoes for $10 each and kids’ shoes for $5 each. Handbags are $10 each, and there’s also a selection of high-end designer shoes for $20 each. (The shoes are new or slightly used, and there are LOTS of new shoes that are donated from local stores, too.)

There will be a Preview Party on May 15, 2015 and the Public Sale is on Saturday, May 16, 2015. (We suggest you get tickets to attend the Preview Party on May 15th if you want the very best selection. The tickets are on sale now. Click here for info.)

Note: If you’re going to the NWA Mom Prom this year, this might be the perfect place to get shoes to go with your Mom Prom dress! The Mom Prom happens this year on May 30, 2015, and the Walk a Mile in My Shoes shopping event happens just two weeks before on the 15th and 16th. Perfect timing!

For more info on the Walk a Mile in My Shoes event, click here to follow the updates on Facebook. We’ll share more details about it as they become available.

walk a mile save the date

 

On Your Mind: Is this a red flag for abuse?

on your mindNOTE: The question below reached us through our “online hotline” button which lets anyone send a question to a local counselor at Ozark Guidance — in a completely anonymous way. The email comes in with no email address and no identifying information. We set it up this way so women would feel free to write about anything on their mind.

pushed in angerToday my husband pushed me in anger. I was not bruised but it shocked me. I have an 8-year-old son (with him). I am glad at least my husband followed me into another room so he did not witness this because I would never want my son to do this to a girl.

We have been married 10 years. He sometimes gets angry and gives me the silent treatment, but has never touched me in anger before. I want our family to stay together and do not want to overreact, however, my training tells me this is a warning sign of potential abuse….

Thank you for your note. You’ve exercised good judgment in this situation in several ways; one is that you recognized that this was not OK. Your spouse should not physically react to you in anger.

Also, you recognized that you don’t want your son to witness violence in your home. Another way you exercised good judgment is that you paused long enough to say, “How should I react to this situation?” Ask yourself the following questions:

  • “How did my spouse react after the incident? Did he recognize that this was not OK?”
  • “Have I seen my spouse react appropriately when he is experiencing anger?” (Appropriate reactions could include discussing his anger in a calm manner, taking time alone to process his anger, or anything that does not make you feel like your safety is being violated.)

Other questions you might ask yourself include:

  • “Was I able to discuss the incident with my spouse in a safe way?”
  • “Do I feel comfortable around my spouse following this incident?”

If you’re unsure about any of these questions, talk to a mental health provider about your feelings and concerns. You have an appropriate level of concern in this situation. I would recommend spending some time thinking through these questions and determining if your home is a safe place for you and your children.

You may decide that this was a unique situation that your spouse regrets, or you may come to the conclusion that you and your son should seek other living arrangements. Either way, this is an important topic for you to give a considerable amount of time, effort, and thought over. Ozark Guidance Center is here to help, so contact us anytime at 479-750-2020.

Therapists at Ozark Guidance would be happy to answer your questions and read what’s on your mind. Click the butterfly icon below to fill out an anonymous submission form with your question or concern. The form contains NO identifying information and is designed to give local women an online place to share concerns with a person qualified to offer feedback.

Disclaimer: This RESPONSE does not provide medical advice It is intended for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Never ignore professional medical advice in seeking treatment because of something you have read on nwaMotherlode or Ozark Guidance websites.